In my previous blog I talked about updating our resumes to be sure we have an accurate account of our (life) experiences for that perfect job (our calling/purpose). I also talked about my journey of updating my resume and how I had friends who prayed for, encouraged, and ministered to me during one of my most difficult (life) experiences.
I thought it was very fitting to blog about confirming your circle because I just returned from DC visiting some of the friends that I referenced. It was refreshing to see and spend time with them, reminisce on those difficult times in a healed place, and celebrate the good things we all have going on. It was even more invigorating to bask in the fact that these awesome women are still my friends and still in my corner although years have passed, we are all in different spaces (business owners, new wives, new moms, etc), and we are miles and miles away.
Y’all (yep that’s a word – Southern/Cornbread Fed) don’t understand. These friends should have “grown weary” with me during that life experience. Every time they would minister to me and speak life into the situation, my negative thoughts and doubt would creep in and I would go through a world of emotions. I would come back to them with the same complaints and they would have to go through the same cycle of ministering me back to life yet again.
During that difficult time is when I really found out that my friends were truly here for me! They were not truly here for me because they always told me what I wanted to hear or because they agreed with all of my petty, foolish antics. They did, however, encourage me in times of doubt and cover me on my journey.
Today, our lives are so busy we sometimes feel we don’t have time to invest in true friendships and relationships. We fill our days with work, soccer games, church activities, house cleaning, shopping, errands—you know the routine. All good, necessary things.
However, purposeful friendships are good and necessary too. Not only are they essential for our growth on our Christian journey, but they are necessary for us to tap into our purpose and remain aligned with God’s will. I literally just met a friend months ago that has been incredibly essential to me stepping out on this faith-filled journey with Biblically Led Cornbread Fed. Can we say #PurposefulFriendship!
Two biblical examples of how a friendship can make or break you:
Mary and Elizabeth – Elizabeth spoke words of blessings and encouragement to Mary. Elizabeth was someone that Mary trusted to give her good godly counsel and pray for her. Mary wanted her faith strengthened and Elizabeth provided confirmation personally for her. Luke 1:39-47
Abram and Lot – Because of God's favor on Abram, God called Abram to go on a journey, which was supposed to lead to the separation of Abram and Lot. God spoke to Abram but Lot tagged along. Lot was never assigned to Abram's journey but Abram allowed him to be there. As a result, controversy arose. Genesis 13
Sunday, August 5th was Friendship Day. In this second half of this year, it is a good time to evaluate your connections and ensure that your calling/purpose and friendships/relationships align. Confirm your calling and your circle!!
The difference in a friend for a common interest and a purposeful friendship…
Common interest friend:
Friends who are friends strictly for a common activity or hobby that they both enjoy.
However, when we arrive in a new season and we no longer have those same interests and we develop new forms of entertainment, this is when we see if there is a true purpose behind a friendship. This is especially true if the hobby or common interest is one that you no longer have interest in as you grow stronger in your walk with Christ but a friend still wants to indulge in it.
Purposeful friendships:
Godly friendships.
Friendships that ultimately push us closer to God and into our purpose.
Friendships that hold us accountable.
Check your friendships to see if you have purposeful, godly friendships! Ask yourself these questions…
Does it distract you from your divine purpose?
Does it enhance your journey?
Are they going in the same direction that you are?
It is important to know the plans God has for us (our calling/purpose) as well as who's going with us on this journey (our circle) because:
The favor of God sometimes causes separation from some people.
Some people tie us to ungodly things.
Who we are associated with can either push us or limit us.
The wrong people in our lives can absolutely be counterproductive to the plans that God has for us.
We tend to hold on to people who we know God said isn’t part of the plan. God loves us so much that He will allow controversy and conflict to push us to a place where we have to let go.
Check your squad and make sure they are true #SquadGoals. Our goal should ultimately be to fulfill the calling that God has on our lives, while living a life pleasing to Him. So our squad needs to be conducive to that goal… #SquadGoals. Most importantly, while it is important that you evaluate your current squad to make sure you don’t have a few “Lots” in your life, also make sure you do a “clearance check” before adding someone to the squad!